Ist der Textabschnitt gut (Geschichte für die Schule)?

Der Titel erklärts vermutlich. Wir mussten einen kleinen Abschnitt zu

-im Park -> Teichufer

-Freunde

-Nachteinbruch

-Adjektive richtig verwenden

schreiben. Kann ich das lassen?

Es war schon recht spät, die Sonne konnte man nur noch als kleinen, roten Halbkreis am Horizont erkennen. In dem Park, in dem wir schlussendlich gelandet waren, waren nur noch wenige Menschen anwesend. Die Grillen sirrten und je länger wir am Teichufer sassen, desto stiller wurde es.

Am Rand des Parks konnte man eine Party erkennen, greller Lichter blitzten am Himmel über den Bäumen auf. Das Wasser gluckerte leise vor sich hin, einige wenige Enten suchten noch nach ihren Gefährten, um es sich gemeinsam im hohen Schilf gemütlich zu machen.

Am anderen Ufer rannte noch ein Spanielwelpe um die Beine seiner küssenden Besitzer herum. Die zwei Turteltäubchen ignorierten ihn gekonnt und versanken immer tiefer in dem Kuss. Erst als ihr kleiner Schützling ein niedliches Kläffen von sich gab, lösten sie sich und begannen zu lachen.

Han und ich warfen uns belustigte Blicke zu, und wandten uns dann diskret dem Himmel zu. Selbst wenn wir uns mitten im Herz einer Grossstadt befanden, konnte man die Sterne erstaunlich genau betrachten, wie sie da oben am Himmelszelt hingen und uns freundlich anfunkelten. Ich legte mich auf den Rücken ins Gras. Han blieb sitzen und ich betrachtete sein Profil.

Mucksmäuschenstill sass er da, die Beine angewinkelt, mit den Armen umschlungen und starrte in den Himmel hinauf. 

Schule, Text, Aufsatz, Abschnitt
Kann jemand meinen Englisch Text verbessern?

Hi, also im Folgenden seht ihr einen Text in Englisch. Ich wäre euch sehr dankbar, wenn ihr ihn korrigieren würdet. Es kann sein, dass ihr viel korrigieren müsst, das tut mir dann sehr leid.

Every day many students drive to school by bus. One ticket almost costs two euros. And when you have to take the bus both rides that are almost four euros. Every day! That's why I would like to comment on if school busses should be free? In my opinion they should be free but let me show you my point of view so that you understand my opinion.

On the one hand busses are already overcrowded and when bus rides become free, probably more kids drive with them instead of getting brought by their parents. And then maybe not everyone fits in the bus. That's another point which should be changed. There should be more busses for students. But that is to big to also talk about now. Possibly when school busses become free more kids drive with them instead of driving bike and then they get un- athletic. But it's very important that children be athletic for stay healthy. On the other hand when no one is brought specially it's ecofriendly and that's a big point why school busses should be free. A disadvantage of driving with the bus is that the school busses often are too late so students come too late to school and that's why some students get brought because they don't want to come too late. This argument speaks against that more children drive with bus, but it is possible to change that. Also it should be considered that students have to come to school independent of money. Some families don't have the money to pay the bus, but their children have to come to school anyway. And when they are dependent to the busses because they can't come to school otherwise, but there isn't enough money for the bus, they have a problem and that's another reason why I have the view that school busses should be free. Also for families who can pay the bus tickets, it's inadmissible to pay because there is compulsory schooling.

To sum it all up I think that school busses should be free because of all the arguments that have been counted. Of course the busses, the bus drivers and the gas have to been payed but the government could pay that. When the cost is too high, the tickets could be cheaper at least. But the existing prizes are too high to pay every day.

Danke für eure Hilfe!

Text, Aufsatz, Erörterung, Grammatik, Korrektur, Rechtschreibung, comment
Englisch Comment - Feedback?

Bitte gibt mir ein Feedback:

The advantages and disadvantages in an exhibition as a company for aircraft manufacturers

Einleitung: In this comment, I will discuss the pros and cons of presenting one’s own company at an exhibition.

 

Hauptteil:

+ In the first line, its good for the company, that they can quickly make contacts fastly, for example by exchanging the data when talking to customers.

- Possible drawbacks include that after a customer conversation everything must be keep up to date so that the customer does not disappear quickly. And for that you also need time.

+ Technically speaking, the team is better able to present they product. An example is, that they can show the Engines at the same time and Place.

– When planning to appear at such events, companies should not forget the heavy things, which needs to transported. All this will cost many energy and time. Such as all the engines are lightweigt for an airplane, but not for the employer. 

+ Its an easy way for the company, to make advertisment. For example telling them the benefits from the company, such as lightweight, sustainable etc. 

– At the same time, there is great competition and leads to competitive pressure, as most similar companies are also at such an event.

Schluss: In my opinion it doesn't really worth it to be at an exhibition, all the nerves, losses time and the pressure etc. I would think about that two times. Maybe only if I have enough time and the desire to do that.

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Englisch Text zum Thema Australien?

Wir müssen in der Arbeit einen Text über Australien schreiben.Ich hab es mal schnell daheim probiert.Könntet ihr mal drüber lesen und verbessern.Sowohl Grammatik und Inhalt.Wäre echt wichtig weil ich eh schlecht in Englisch bin.Groß und Kleinschreibung nicht beachten.Das wurde so als ich es hier eingetippt habe.

I will tell you something about Australia.The Name Australia comes from the Latin word austalis which means southern ans the native Australiens Are Valley Aboriginal.

Australia is one of the most urbanised countries in the world.That is because there are large Parts of the country with very climatic conditions which means that Therme Are very high temperatures and Little Rain.The Capital of Australia is Canberra but the bigest City is Sydney.Sydney is known für example für the Sydney Tower or the Opera House.

The Opera House is located in the West of Sydney and there Are More Than 1000 Shows in a year.

Australia has also Dome famous people how Margot Robbie or Keith Urban.Keith Urban is a singer Andy Songwriter ans he is active since 1990. His Most famous Songs eure for example Somebody like you or you will think of me.Margot Robbie is a achtes and Producer.She grew up in Gold Coast and now she is living in Los Angeles.

Australia has also a beautiful Wildlife with very fascinating animals how the Tansania Devil or the koala.But los of the animals stand on the red List because of the bushfire because it is very hot ans dry and much animals lost Their Habitat or died.

In Australia There ist also the Great Barrier Reef.It is a UNESCO World heritage ans it is known for his biodiversity.The Reef is the home of More than 1000 of sea Snakes,Fish,Chorals and a lot of More animals and ist is as big as Germany.

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Geschichte schreiben?

Hallo ich muss eine geschichte schreiben für die schule und zwar im thema Gothic Literature das ist was ich soweit habe:

The Face

I lay in my bed in the eerie midnight dreary, with my wife beside me while she read “A tale of two cities”. Outside the rain was hammering down and once in a while thunder sounded. The fire crackled in the wind that entered through the gap of the window. Every once in a while you hear raven’s shrill shriek screech, as it is tring to flee from the horrid thunderstorm. I glanced at the gloomy moon that lit up the room through the curtains. The murky moon was the only light source that kept shapes regocnizeable, as the candles were flickering and soon showed no sign of light. 

The bed creaked as I gradually turned around to wish my love, “Good night.” The light of the deep silver moon taking one's time passed the house, and the room fell into deep darkness. I quickly dozed off into deep slombering.

There was an ear spliting screach echoing through the house in the dead of the night. I wanted to grab for my wife, but she wasn’t there. My heart sank and my eyes widened, I fell into a state of schock. I suspected horrid things, as I leaped for the door and slammed it open. It felt like I did the greatest long jump down the stairs. But it was too late. There was no sign of her anymore other explanation for me than that my love was taken away. I knew I had to find this horrid creature who dared to take her. I screamed,”Elenor!” but no reply.

I went back up the stairs in deep sadness but also in such anger. I asked myself “What will I do now,” or “Will I ever see my love again.” It felt like an eternity until I reached the top of the steep stairs. When I did I colapsed onto the bed falling trying to process the schock I don’t remember properly but it was maybe 4-5 am and I just layed there like a dead body until it was about 7 am.I decided to slowly proceed down stairs and grabbed myself some cereal and threw myself onto the well worn couch. 

When I turned around and looked outside there was a face, a face that stared deep into my soul through the morning dawn, with eyes that were as white as snow and the body was covered in a black coat as black as his soul I supposed. It rapidly came into my mind that this might be the creature of horror that took my wife. I rushed through the pitch black kitchen and grabed the largest knive I could find. I wanted revenge, but not any one wher he could never get me back.

When I came outside there was nothing, it had disappeared. It vanished into thin air with no sign of it, it was gone. I looked around for a few minutes but still no sign of the beast. Fustrated, I back inside.

- - - - - - -

Und ich habe mir vor geschtelt das er dieses Gesicht noch weitere male sieht und er dann ganz paranoid wird und dass dann im ende das Gesicht ihm umbringt werend er schläft und die frau sieht das durchs Fenster und rent weg in denn Wald und dass die Geschichte dann so interesant ended dass sie wegrent und man sich dann so fragen stellt.

Es wäre sehr nett wenn mir jemand helfen könnte die Geschichte fertig zu schreiben

Danke im Voraus

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Englisch?

Könnte jemand eventuell einen Blick über meinen Englischtext über das Praktikum werfen (besonders bezogen auf die Grammatik) ? Das wäre echt lieb, danke!

When I arrived at my old primary school today, I went to the secretary to see in which classes I had to go. A lot of teachers were there who greeted me in a very friendly way. Then I got a timetable on which I could see where I had to go. The first lesson was in class 3b at 7:45 a.m. The class teacher was called Mrs x. She told me to help two students at reading and writing who didn’t speak German at all. At first it was quite difficult because they didn‘t understand me well and I wanted to teach them how to write s, m and o and how to read some words. Therefore, I tried to speak in English and make signs so that they would understand me better. It actually worked and they managed it to write the letters and read some of the words! It was really fun because they were so cute and they always listened to me and respected me. In the second lesson which began at 8:40 a.m., they had maths where I tried to teach the girl multiplication of the number 2 and it worked really well because she always understood me when I said something. I tried to teach the other boy the addition of numbers and he also understood me. At first it was pretty difficult as I said, but then it got easier and easier! At 9:45 a.m, the first break began and I went to the teacher‘s room to talk to teachers. They asked me a lot of questions, for example, what my name is or which school I go to. Everyone was kind. When the break was over at 10 a.m, I should go to class 3c which is taught by the class teacher Mrs xy. They had science and the topic was potatoes. I should help two students at completing exercises in their book. They had to match pictures to expressions which were about potatoes and so on. It worked well. There weren’t many exercises to do. Again, they were very kind and loved spending time with me. Then, the second break began at 10:50 a.m where I went outside to get some fresh air. Suddenly, a lot of students came to me and asked questions. It was so cute and stressful at the same time because you had to answer to a lot of questions in a short time. After that, a girl came to me to tell me about people who were on the climbing wall without any permission and she wanted me to tell them they should get off the wall. That‘s why I went to the wall and told them to get off and they listened to me. By the way, they should get off because it was wet to avoid accidents. Apart from that, I was walking in the school yard while I was watching the students which were playing. After the break, I didn‘t really have to do anything because the class teacher of class 3c only explained a lot of things about the school, so things which had nothing to do with lessons and so on. After that, I had another break where I went to the teacher‘s room to ask some questions about the job, such as the advantages and disadvantages. She answered them very clearly which made me happy because I could think  better about whether the job is perfect for me or not. I came to the conclusion that the job would be suit me! Then, at 12:45 PM I had to work in the school cafeteria to have the control about the children’s behavior and to lay the table. Next, the students of class 1a had P.E. at 1:45 PM. They really wanted me to play games with them which made me feel very comfortable and happy because they enjoyed spending time with me. It was very fun because the students were really funny, lovely, and cute. In the last lesson, so at 2:45 AM, we went back to their classroom and played games again. I also resolved disputes, for example, someone judged the other one without any reason. That‘s why I talked to the person and said it was not okay and he should not do it again. Luckily, he listened to me. In the end of the day, it was a very funny day and I loved spending time with the students there because they are very cute and I think the job suits me very well!

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Kann man das so abgeben?

Guten Tag,

ich habe vor ein work and holiday jahr in Japan zu verbringen,
Dafür benötige ich allerdings eine motivation Letter, welche auf Englisch geschrieben werden soll.

Da mein Englisch jetzt nicht wirklich das beste ist wollte ich einfach mal fragen ob ihr denkt, das mein Text aktzeptabel ist oder ich ihn doch lieber neu schreiben sollte.

Dear Sir and Madam,

I am Max Mustermann, and I just graduated from high school.

In the following, im going to describe how and why the idea of applying for a working holiday visa in Japan came to mind.

The first bond with Japan was tied way back when I was a little boy who enjoyed watching Dragonball on the TV. Since then, a lot has changed, but my fascination for the country has stayed the same.

I started dreaming about going on vacation there, which sadly couldt be fulfilled, due to several reasons. Now that my schooldays have come to an end, I started questioning what to do after. Soon the idea of traveling to Japan consolidated, and I wanted to absolve a year of work and travel.

After learning more about the traditions, gods, and spirits that can be found throughout the whole country my interest was caught. I want to experience first hand what its like to go to a shrine or learning from monks and priests, what inner peace realy means.

Of course, I also heard about Japan’s hospitality, kindness, and patience. It astonishes me that a whole country can have a reputation that good, so much that I want to spend the whole next year there.

I plan to explore a lot of different sides of Japan. A few destinations are for example, Tokyo, Kyoto, Nara, Uji and Shimoda.

Furthermore, it is about being interested in Japans daily life, work, food, history, and what similarities and differences there are compared to Germany and the whole country itself.

I hope to improve my Japanese and learn a lot of interesting things in/about Japan.

Thanks for taking your time.

Kind regards,

MAx Mustermann

Text, Aufsatz, Grammatik, Rechtschreibung
Englisch?

Könnte jemand bitte wieder über meinen Text drüber schauen? Es geht wieder um einen Tag in dem Bildungszentrum. Danke!

,,When we arrived there on the fifth day, we had to go to our maintenance group/department (Gewerk?) immediately because we already knew which group we belonged to. At first, we had to start forming the dough into small balls for the Cakepops. The dough was dough of a marble cake which we had baked the day before. It was pretty hard because they weren‘t allowed to have cracks in it and the dough didn‘t form into a ball because it always fell apart which was very annoying. It didn‘t matter what I tried. Then the manager helped me and after that I managed it myself. We put them into a freezer and while they were getting cold, we were cleaning the kitchen. I had to wipe the kitchen counters by using a cleaning cloth and then we had to use a water hole to wet the floor. Next we took a scrubber and a water squeegee to clean it. It was quite difficult to clean it because you had to be strong to clean every dirty spot on the floor. The water squeegee was very hard to use because you had to exert extreme strength to clean it correctly. After that, when the cakepops were colder, we dipped them into hot chocolate and we decorated them by using sprinkles. Then we put them into the fridge and we had to do the same things again, so cleaning the kitchen. After we had finally managed it, the day was already over. As a reward, we ate the cakepops outside.

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Englisch?

Hallo, könnte sich jemand bitte meinen Text anschauen (vor allem Grammatik). Vorab will ich sagen, dass es um einen Tag in einem Bildungszentrum geht.

When we arrived there on the second day, we had to go to our maintenance groups immediately. On that day, there was another specialist, so we had to introduce ourselves to her. After introducing, we got two sheets of paper. On the first one, there was only an eye and on the second one, there was a whole face. She said we had to paint makeup on both the eye and the face. In my opinion, my pictures were very ugly and it was very difficult for me because I can‘t draw well and I have never worn makeup before. After that, we grabbed our hairdressing heads which still had curlers in their hair and we had to remove them. They needed to be left in their hair overnight so that a volume winding would form. Luckily, it worked! Then we had to create our own hairstyle on our hairdressing head. The specialist said my hairstyle was pretty good. Then we could style and wash each other‘s hair again and X wanted to try  volume winding again as it didn‘t work on the previous day. On that day, it definitely worked better but she had to dry her hair with a hair dryer for about one hour because her hair was still too wet to remove the curlers from her hair. I was so sorry for her. Finally, she did it after one hour and her hair looked gorgeous, so in my opinion it was worth it. In the last 50 minutes, we could wear makeup but of course I didn‘t want, so I observed my classmates again. On the one hand, I think I could work as a hairdresser in future because it‘s interesting what customers tell you while I‘m styling their hair and it‘s also interesting to try out different hairstyles but on the other hand, this job doesn‘t match to me  because I‘m scared of doing mistakes because for example I could cut off a customer‘s hair and I don‘t want to touch stranger‘s hair. 

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Englisch?

Hallo, könnte sich jemand bitte meinen Text anschauen (vor allem Grammatik). Vorab will ich sagen, dass es um einen Tag in einem Bildungszentrum geht.

,,When we hadn‘t arrived yet, I was really scared because I had thought that it would be similar to my internship in March. But when I arrived there, I wasn‘t scared anymore because the specialists greeted us in a very friendly way. We all were standing there while the specialist was telling us where we were going to work in the following two days. I was in the maintenance group which was called cosmetic. I don‘t have anything to with cosmetic at all because I still don‘t paint my nails, wear make-up and so on, so I thought that it would be fun. When we came into the special room, we first watched a video about safety- and hygiene measures. Then we started working. We got a hairdressing head and curles because we had to do a volume winding. It was pretty difficult for me because I had never done it before in my life. Luckily, the specialist helped me and I did it alone after that! Next, we could paint our nails and do a manicure. I didn‘t do anything because I neither wanted to paint my nails nor a manicure because as I said, I am not interested in painting my nails. I was only observing my classmates who were painting their nails, yet it was very interesting because they they were hilarious. After that, we were allowed to wash each other‘s hair and also to do a hairstyle by using for example a hair curler and straightener. We washed X‘s hair and we did her a volume winding. Sadly, it didn’t work because we did it wrongly.“

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Was ist eure Meinung zur folgenden Englisch-Klausuraufgabe?

ist die folgende Mediation gelungen?:

Hello,

So as we are working on a joint project on unequal distribution of income, I have come upon on an interesting article in the "Stern" magazine. The author Walter Wüllenberg states his profound opinion about the class mobility in Germany and how this has changed in the last years. In the following I will point out the main arguments and their argumentation.

Firstly, the author states, that the German inequality of class is not comparable to the American Class inequality, as the German discussion about class was about the under class and their immobility, whereas the US discussion about class was always accomplished by the prolific idea of the American Dream. This shows in the social spendings of Germany too, spending more than half of the income of the estate, incomparable to the US with only a fifth of theirs.

Henceforth, the author states that the class inequality in Germany much rather shows in the not existing middle class than in the poor estate of the under class. While economy has grown hugely in the last decades, the wages have nearly stagnated, showing that economies growth could not bared by society as a whole but only by the rich. Thus, the rich have gotten immensely richer, owning most of the capital of the country, and the rest just held their class. Yet the divide between the classes has grown and their nearly is no in between. This is worth the criticism because the growth of the economy is due to the work of the society as a whole, yet only few bear the fruits of the hard work, being quite unfair.

I hope that this has helped you and that it may have provoked some thoughts considering inequality. I would like to hear from you.

GaLIGrü, 

Bild zum Beitrag
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