Englisch Hausaufgabe?
Hey
Ich musste für Englisch einen Text darüber schreiben wie ein Tag ohne (mein) Handy für mich aussieht.
Den habe ich grad geschrieben und gemerkt dass er sich schon ziemlich blöd anhört :/
Könnt ihr den vielleicht verbessern/überarbeiten?
Typical Day without my Phone
Dear world!
In this blog I will show you how one day in my live looks like without my phone.
At first I did not get up early enough but it was okay, because it was a day in my winter holidays. I played with my rabbits and made them their food. After that I wrote more and more on my story because I want to get ready with it. In this story I write a love story I want to publish in some years. When I was ready with one chapter on my own story I went for a walk with my dog and went to the stables with my best friends and had a lot of fun – without my phone! After all of this I did only eat and do the things of the early morning again (write on my story, fed my rabbits etc).
It was really difficult for me to let my phone at home. Sometimes I felt like I am crazy because everyone was checking their phones in the bus and nobody looked out of the window or do anything else without their phone.
I am happy to say I am doing without my phone since more than 3 weeks. But I am happy to get my phone back in three days.
3 Antworten
Typical Day without my Phone
"day" und "phone" musst du klein schreiben. Ich würde an den Anfang des Satzes noch ein "a" setzen. Oder du könntest auch schreiben: "A day in my self-experiment: living without my phone"
After that I wrote more and more on my story, because I want to get ready with it.
Da würde ich schreiben: "After that I wrote more and more on the story I'm currently creating, because I want to finish it"
In this story I write a love story I want to publish in some years
Vielleicht eher: "This story is about love and I want to publish it in a few years"
When I was ready with one chapter on my own story I went for a walk with my dog and went to the stables with my best friends and had a lot of fun
"When I succesfully completed another chapter of my story, I got up for a walk with my dog, who was begging me, to go for a walk with him. Right after that, my best friends and I went to the stables, and we had lots of fun and a really great day!"
After all of this I did only eat and do the things of the early morning again
"After all of this, I did only eat and did do the things of the early morning again"
I am happy to say I am doing without my phone since more than 3 weeks. But I am happy to get my phone back in three days.
"I am happy to say I've been doing fine without my phone, for more than three weeks now. But I am really grateful to get my phone back in three days.
Hallo,
A Typical Day without my Phone
Dear world!
In this blog I will show you how (Wort) one day in my live (Wort) looks like without my phone.
At first (Komma) I did not get up (Zeit) early enough but it was okay, because it was a day in my winter holidays. I played with my rabbits and made them their food. After that I wrote more and more (Ausdruck) on (Präposition) my story because I want (Zeit) to get ready with it.
In this story I write a love story (Wiederholung) I want to publish in some years. When I was ready with one chapter on (Präposition) my own story (Wiederholung) (Komma) I went for a walk with my dog and went to the stables with my best friends and had a lot of fun – without my phone! After all (---) this (Komma) I did only eat (Grammatik) and do (Grammatik) the things of the early morning again (Formulierung) (write on (Wendung) my story, fed my rabbits etc).
It was really difficult for me to let (Wort) my phone at home. Sometimes I felt like I am (Zeit) crazy because everyone was checking their phones in (Präposition) the bus and nobody looked out of the window or do (Zeit) anything else without their phone.
I am happy to say I am doing (Zeit) without my phone since (Wort) more than 3 weeks. But I am happy to get my phone back in three days.
- Du schreibst an einem typischen Tag ohne dein Handy eine Liebesgechichte?
- Du springst kunterbunt zwischen den Zeiten hin und her.
Das Fettgedruckte muss korrigiert werden. Ich hoffe, ich habe nichts übersehen.
Für das Vokabular und die Rechtschreibung empfehle ich ein gutes (online) Wörterbuch, z.B. pons.com,
für die Grammatik ego4u.de und englisch-hilfen.de - und Finger weg vom Google Übelsetzer und seinen tr.tteligen Kollegen!
:-) AstridDerPu
Würde vielleicht mehr satirisch schreiben, wenn du das hinbekommst. Das Experiment soll ja bestimmt auch zum Nachdenken anregen.
Also irgendwie: Wer braucht schon einen Alarm, wenn er eh kein Handy hat, wo er sofort die neusten TikToks anschauen kann. Den Hasen servierte ich das Frühstück wie ein TV Koch, weil ich das von Twitch so kenne. In die Richtung.