Englischen Text: Wie würdet ihr den bewerten?

Hallo ich habe einen essay geschrieben über compulsory first aid courses for fourteen year olds und das ist ein maturabeispiel gewesen und ich wollte fragen, ob jemand das durchlesen könnte und es bewerten könnte, welche note das wäre, vor allem mit den fehlern und so. Ich habe den Text komplett alleine geschrieben und das in 20 Minuten, weil bei der Matura haben wir sehr wenig Zeit für zwei Texte also nur eine Stunde. Ich würde mich echt freuen. :)

Nowadays young people has access to more goods like education. In our modernity, they can extend their knowledge pretty easily as technology, for instance, is spread all over the world and as they can attain school which offers a ton of diverse subjects. However, people still argue that many of these don’t teach valuable lessons about the real life. Instead, young people already want to accomplish experiences that educate them for certain situations, perhaps helping someone out in hazardous situations. In result of these arguably issues, people suggest signing 14-year olds up for compulsory first aid courses.

Compulsory first aid courses can be ideal and influential for young people collecting more real life based experiences. Moreover, they can even give them an insight on how a situation can alter in only one instant and how people can put themselves in danger, precisely fighting against death. Teaching sessions about helping someone, in terms of surviving, can reflect young people’s interests. Some students already complain on having deplorable teaching sessions at school, regardless of their subject area. Maths, science, biology,  physics might enforce their intellectual thoughts but what about focusing on their mind set. Are they even that mentally stable to handle emergency situations? Would they even risk themselves to help someone out after they crashed their car into a tree? Are they even willing to sacrifice themselves and is it even worth?

At this point, students would take school more seriously as compulsory first aid courses influence students mental mind set. In this case, the integration of first aid courses into school is essential for young people. 14 year olds must bear the importance of life teaching sessions. So, the government need to go after their obligations to pay these courses. After all, education should be free and accessible to everyone. School subjects should not only consist of languages or natural sciences, but the government also have to consider the fact that students have to train their cognitive skills as well.

Moreover, the government can also detect people’s reactions would shape in a deferential way if the education system would be more comprehensive and creative. I mean, how can someone not find it intriguing that the education system develops more on its way to be immaculate. It would pique everybody’s curiosity how young people desirably helps out to change the world into a better place. Knowledge has the power for it.

In conclusion, it can be said that if someone comes up with compulsory first aid courses, it should be already associated in the school’s education system. Fourteen year old should be, at this degree, handle emergency situations and activate their human instincts to sacrifice themselves. 

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Kann jemand das für mich korrigieren? Ich soll Stative und Dynamic verben einsetzen?

JOE:

Have you read the newspaper article about Susi Shine? It says she IS EXPLOITING (exploit) Chinese labourers. Actually, that SOUND (sound) terrible.

HEATHER: | AM WORKING (work) on a class project and didn't have time to read go papers. I DOUBT (doubt) that a successful celebrity like her would do anything like that.

JOE: it is true. I PROMISE (promise). After she became famous as a singer started designing clothes and shoes. She IS MAKING (make) money with her fancy dresses and her shoes. And now she even OWN (own) a company that produces her clothes and shoes in China! Three activists investigated labour conditions at this factory that SEEM (seem) to produce shoes under terrible working conditions.

HEATHER: Oh, yes. Sure, I REMEMBER (remember) the news! The three activists ARE WORKING (work) for China Labor Watch, which is based in New York.

They ARE INVESTIGATING (investigate) this factory in China. How could I forget?

JOE:

Exactly, the activists INDENT (intend) to publish a report showing that Susi Shine BELONG (belong) to the group of business people who ARE ACCEPTINV (accept) low pay, massive overtime, crude verbal

abuse and unacceptable misuse of labour in Chinese factories to increase their profit.

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Ist das richtig gutes Englisch?

Oder merkt man sofort, dass eine Maschine das übersetzt hat? Ich kann zwar ein wenig Englisch, aber zu wenig, als dass ich den Originaltext aus dem Deutschen in richtig gutes Englisch übersetzen könnte. Die Übersetzung stammt also nicht von mir, sondern von einer KI. Merkt man das?

Completely relaxed, nine-year-old Karl lay in the grass under the ancient oak tree, gazing with a small smile at the magnificent green canopy above him. The sun was high in the brilliantly blue sky, and its warmth felt wonderful. Not a single cloud had been seen all morning on this day in July 1870.

Like all children, Karl also loved the long summer holidays. This was undoubtedly the most beautiful time of the year. He had played with his friends all morning, but now one after the other had gotten hungry and had gone home.

But Karl did not want to go home yet. Out here on the meadow in front of the small town of Rehna, it was so beautiful, and around noon was always the time when his father always locked the pharmacy for two hours and came home for lunch. He preferred to avoid an encounter with him. As far back as he could remember, he had feared his father. There was not a single day in his life when he had not been afraid of him.

Above him, in the branches of the oak, a bird sang its song, but the boy hardly noticed the singing. He had closed his eyes and was trying to remember as far back as he could. There were very early images in his head, the loving face of his mother, and a few vague memories that had no meaning. But finally, he found the first coherent memory of his life.

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Ist mein französischer Text richtig?

Hallo, ich bin in der achten Klasse und wir müssen eine Selbstbeschreibung in Französisch schreiben(Klassenarbeit). Da wollte ich euch mal fragen, ob mein Text ein zu niedriges Niveau hat wenn ja, könnt ihr es bitte verbessern?was heißt achte Klasse auf Französisch? ich mag meinen Text auch nicht so sehr, weil es sehr monoton klingt. Jede Verbesserung hilft! Dankeschön. ist sehr dringend! Hier kommt mein Text:

Je m’appelle … . J’ai 13 ans et je vais 14 ans le 9 août. J’habite à … . C’est entre … et … . Mon père s’appelle … et ma mère s’appelle … . J’ai deux sœurs. Je les adore. Mon hobby est volleyball. Je joue avec …,… et … petit sœur … . Je n’ai pas de chien et chat, parce que j’ai peur. Je vais au collège… . Je suis(?in der 8.Klasse?). L’art et l’anglais sont mes préférés matière. Dans ma temps libre. j’aime reconte mes amis dans le cinéma. Mes amis et moi aussi adorent écoute à Ariana grande. Nous chason préféré est 7 rings. Ma couleur préférée est rose. J’aime ma pull rose aussi.(Ich werde an diesem Tag einen rosanen Pulli anziehen.) Ma plat préféré est une pizza, et mon dessert préféré est un croissant. C’est tout merci pour l’écoute!

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