Korrektur meines Englischtextes
Hallo an alle, die die englische Sprache gut beherrschen. Ich muss einen Text über die Unterschiede zwischen Indien und Europa schreiben. Da mein Englisch nicht soooo gut ist, würde ich mich über Korrekturvorschläge freuen. Schönen Abend noch
The text Letter from a Land of Paradoxesfrom Vibha Surana deals with the differenses between India and the West-European countrys.
The first point is family. In India the parents are dominant and the kids have to follow them. The families in Europe are not so hierarchlly like in India. The next point are animals. Indish people thinks that animals have the same rights like human. So their are not handle them like we handle our pets. Furthermore, the religions are difference too. India have a lot of relegions and so many goods. In Europe are three main religions with only one good. My last point are the languages. Every European country has a mother tongue like England has english and Germany has german. In contrast, India has more than one languages which were spoken in the land. (komischer Satz oder?)
Finally, there are a lot of differences between India and the West but there are similarities too. Both areas lies on the coast and have a beautiful culture.
Ich hoffe, dass der Text einigermaßen geht. MfG
5 Antworten
The text „Letter form a land of Paradoxes“ from Vibha Surana tells of the differences between India and the West European countries.
First of all, it relates to their families. In India parents use to be very dominant, so the kids have to obey them. Families within Europe are not that hierarchic like they are in India. The next point refers to animals. Indian people think that animals have the same rights like human beings. So they don’t treat them the way we do. Furthermore, the religions are different, too, because India has many religions and Gods. In Europe are three main religions with only one God. At least, the languages have to be mentioned. Each European country has got one mother tongue, for example in Germany the spoken language is German, in England it is English an so on. In contrast to Germany, India has more than only one language.
Finally, there are many differences between India and the West, although there are a few similarities, too. Both areas lie on the coast and have a wonderful culture.
Vielen Dank,
Passt es jetzt mein TEXT Ausgebessert:
South Africa is an emerging nation on the southern tip of the African continent. It has three capital cities, Pretoria, Johannesburg and Bloemfontein. 57, 9 million people live in South Africa. The majority of South Africans are Christian. South Africa has 11 official languages but the most spoken is English. The local currency is called the rand.
There are many wild animals and national parks in South Africa, and safari tourism is a great source of income.
South Africa doesn’t have a uniform culture because of its ethnic diversity and history. Customs and traditions often depend on the region and the population.
Stereotypes of South Africa are that wild animals move freely around the country, the locals speak African and it isn’t safe to travel there.
Between 1948 and 1994 South Africa was ruled by apartheid, a form of racism.
Bitte schau ob ich Fehler habe bitte DRINGEND?
The text Letter from a Land of Paradoxesfrom Vibha Surana deals with the differences between India and the West-European countries.
The first point is family. In India the parents are dominant and the kids have to follow them. The families in Europe are not so das wort gibts nicht like in India. The next point are animals. Indish people think that animals have the same rights like humans. So theiy do not handle them like we handle our pets. Furthermore, the religions are different too. India has a lot of relegions and so many gods. In Europe are three main religions with only one god. My last point are the languages. Every European country has a mother tongue like England has english and Germany has german. In contrast, India has more than one language which were spoken in this land. (komischer Satz oder?)
Finally, there are a lot of differences between India and the West but there are das wort gibts nicht too. Both areaslie on the coast and have a beautiful culture.
Ich bin auch kein Experte aber das ist das was mir aufgefallen ist hoffe ich konnte dir wenigstens ein bisschen helfen
Natürlich gibt es das Wort "similarities" O_o und das erste müsste "hierarchically " heißen... statt nur zu sagen dass es das nicht gibt (was nicht stimmt, es ist nur einfach falsch geschrieben), könntest du auch gleich das richtige Wort verwenden...
Ein paar wenige Anmerkungen zu deinem Aufsatz:
Zum Wort England - wird NICHT als Begriff für Großbritannien verwendet, da nur der kleine Teil ohne Schottland und ohne Irland sonst gemeint ist, und für böses Blut dort zwischen den Bevölkerungsgruppen sorgt. Die sind da echt sehr empfindlich, wenn sie als Engländer bezeichnet werden in Schottland und Irland!!
Götter sind in dem Fall deities zu nennen.
Indish - gibt es nicht, muss Indian heissen oder people in India
dominant - Eltern sind nicht dominant, sondern authoritarian!!
to follow - folgen im Sinne von nachfolgen, hinterhergehen etc. im Sinne von gehorchen, entweder to obey oder to do what their parents tell them
Pass bitte ein wenig auf deine Plural-s und Singularnomen auf, das gleiche gilt für 3.Person Singular, hier brauchst du doch auch ein s! Aber das weißt du sicher, das ist einfach mangelnde Sorgfalt, und verdirbt dir die Noten völlig unnötigerweise, ist schade drum.
Ich hab mal den Text etwas überarbeitet, nicht sehr sehr elegant , denn das würde deinem Lehrer schon auffallen, aber die gröbsten Fehler sind mal ausgebessert und etwas umformuliert. Was in ( ) steht, ist nicht richtig, muss weg, was in GROSSBUCHSTABEN steht, musst du natürlich nicht groß schreiben, ist nur der Hinweis, dass diese Formulierungen von mir sind.
The text Letter from a Land of Paradoxes WRITTEN BY Vibha Surana deals with the (differenses) differences between India and the West-European (countrys) countries.
The first point the author touches is ABOUT family. In India (the) parents are (dominant) AUTHORITARIAN and (the) kids have to (follow) DO WHAT THEIR PARENTS TELL them. (The) WHEREAS family structures in Europe are not as hierarchical as in India. The next point IS ABOUT animals. (Indish) People in INDIA think that animals have TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT (the same rights like humanS.) So THEY DO NOT TREAT THEM IN THE SAME WAY AS WE DO WITH OUR PETS.( are not handle them like we handle our pets.) Furthermore, the beliefs are (difference) different to our European beliefs. IN India (have) WE FIND a lot of religions and so many( goods) DEITIES. In Europe WE HAVE ONLY three main religions with only one good. THE last point is about languages. Every European country has an own mother tongue e.g. the British speak English and Germans speak German. In contrast, India has more than one language(s) (which were spoken in the land.) In fact there are countless languages and dialects. (komischer Satz oder?)
Finally YOU CAN SAY, there are a lot of differences between India and the West but there are some similarities too. Both COUNTRIES are bordering on the sea and both have a beautiful culture. (Das find ich jetzt nicht so gelungen, diesen Punkt, solltest dir einen anderen einfallen lassen vielleicht?)
(DAS Ganze ist sehr flach und oberflächlich formuliert, hast du ein paar Belege dafür? Sorry)
The text "Letter from a Land of Paradoxes " by Vibha Surana deals with the differences between India and western european countries.
The first point is family. In India, parents are dominant and the kids have to be obedient.
The families in Europe don't have such a hierarchic structure like in India. The next point are animals. Indian people think that animals have the same rights like humans. So they are not handling them like we behave towards our pets. Furthermore, the religions are difference as well. India has got many different relegions and many gods. In Europe are three main religions with only one god. My last point are the languages. While in India ____ languages are spoken (bitte recherchiere über Wikipedia, wie viele), most European countries have only a few official languages (like German in Germany). (Bitte bedenke, dass auch die Schweiz 4 offizielle Sprachen hat usw.)
In contrast, India has more than one languages which were spoken in the land.
Finally, there are a lot of differences between India and the West but there are similarities too. Both areas are situated close to the coast and have a rich cultural life.
Ja das stand alle in den Text, welchen wir im Unterricht bekommen haben.