Was kann man bei diesem Text weglassen?
Ich muss am Freitag meiner Eurocom (Englisch Prüfung) über Walt Disney halten. Ich habe den Text bereits geschrieben geübt, leider komme ich über die fünf Minuten raus. Ich hab ihn jetzt schon ziemlich gekürzt, aber er ist trotzdem zu lang. Was kann ich noch weglassen? Was ist unwichtig?
Text ist unten in den Bildern.
4 Antworten
Text nochmal: Walt Disney
About Walter Elias Disney
Disney was born on the 5th December 1901 in Hermosa. Walter Elias Disney grew up with his parents, his sister Ruth and his three brothers, Herbert, Raymond and Roy on a farm in Missouri. Walt has always been interested in drawing and visited with 14 years his first drawing lessons. After the first world war disney started to draw short promotional films with Ubbe Iwerks. 1925 he married Lillian Marie Bounds. With his wife he bedame two daughters Diane Marie, Sharon Mae. He was diagnosed with lung cancer. and died on 15 December 1966, ten days after his 65th birthday.
Mickey Mouse and his friends
Disney lost the rights to Oswald,his old charakter so he need to create a new to replace him. Ub Iwerks designed a Mouse and Disney has give him his personality. First the Mouse was named 'Mortimer', but Walters wife Lillian, thought the name 'Mickey' would fit better. Disney has produced two short silent films with his new charakter Mickey, Plane Crazy and The Gallopin' Gaucho. But both films where not a big sucsess. So Walter published on the 18. November 1928 his first film with sound, Steamboat Willie. With Walt as the voice of Mickey, the cartoon was an instant sensation. Later Disney and Iwerks created friends for Mickey Mouse. Mickeys female Friend, the mouse Minnie. Minnies first appearing was already in the film Steamboat Willie. In 'The Wise litte Hen' Disney shows another friend of Mickey. The a little bit aggressive Duck, Donald. Goofy, who orginally was named Dippy Dawg, had his first occurs 1932 in the film 'Mickeys Revue' The first appearance of Pluto, Mickey's dog was in 1930 in 'The chain gang'.
Most popular movies
Snow White In 1937 Disney premiered Snow white and the seven dwarfs in Los Angeles. The Movie tell a story about a princess, Snow White, which escapes from her evil stepmother, the queen and live with 7 friendly dwarfs.The Movie won eight oscars.
Pinocchio In 1940, Disney presendet his second full-length animated film, Pinocchio. Gepettos wish that Pinocchio, a wooden marionette, be a real boy is fulfiled by a fairy. To keep him out of trouble the fairy order Jiminy to act as Pinocchio's "conscience". But Jiminy is not so sucsessfull and Pinocchio spends almost the full movie to be in trouble. Disney receive two Oscars for that movie.
Peter Pan In 1953 Disney brought out a movie about a boy who never grew up, peter. Peter takes the three childreen of the Darling family, and takes them to Never Land. In Never Land is going on a war between Peters gang and the evil Captain Hook.
Dumbo In 1941 Walt Disney celebrate another sucsessfull premiere. The Story: A stork bring a baby elephant to Mrs Jumbo, a circus elephant, because of his really big ears the other elephants call him dumbo. Dumbos only friend is Tymothy Q. the Mouse, who helps him to bring out his full potential. The Movie became one oscar.
Bambi Bambi, a young deer, grows up and and have fun with his friends, Flower and Thumper, in the forest. One day, however, the hunters come, and Bambi must prove braveness. Disney make a movie from this story and premiered it, in1942 in the UK. The movie receive three oscars.
Cinderella Cinderella a beautiful princess, is treated badly from her stepmother and her daugthers. The stepmother prevents Cinderella from going to a Royal Ball, but with the help from the mice Gus and Jaq and the Fairy Godmother she get to the Ball. That was the story from the movie that Disney premiered in 1950 in Boston. The movie won 3 Oscars.
Disneyland The Disneyland Paris, is an entertainment resort in Marne-la-Vallée, a town near paris. After four years of construction period it was opened on 12th of April 1992. In the park you can take phots with Disneys most popular charakters. The Park is divided in five areas, that are grouped around the sleeping beauty castle
Main Street The Main Street is begins after the entrace, in the street are mainly restaurant and shops.
Discoveryland In the Discoveryland the visitors travel into the future.
Fantasyland In Fanatasyland visitors dive into the world of different fairy tales and fantasy stories.
Adventureland In Adventureland, visitors can enter the world of several adventures like Pirates of the Caribbean.
Frontierland This area is furnished to a typical Wild West scenery.
Awards and Honor
In his whole lifetime Disney has relaesed 81 films. Disney has two stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, one for motion pictures and the other for his television work. He won 32 oscars and was nominated 59 times.
Disneyland
(---) Disneyland Paris, is an entertainment resort in Marne-la-Vallée, a town near paris. After four years of construction (---) Komma it was opened on 12th of April 1992 (s.o.). In the park Komma you can take phots with Disneys most popular charakters. The Park is divided in five areas kein Komma that are grouped around the sleeping beauty castle
Main Street
(---) Main Street (---)begins after the entrace, in the street Hier fehlt ein Wort. are mainly restaurant and shops.
Discoveryland
In (---)Discoveryland the visitors travel into the future.
Fantasyland
In Fanatasyland visitors dive into the world of different fairy tales and fantasy stories.
Adventureland
In Adventureland, visitors can enter the world of several adventures like Pirates of the Caribbean.
Frontierland
This area is furnished to a typical Wild West scenery.
Awards and Honor (= AE; BE = Honour)
In his whole lifetime
Komma Disney has relaesed (Zeit) 81 films. Disney has two stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, one for motion pictures and the other Hier fehlt das Stützwort one. for his television work. He won 32 oscars and was nominated 59 times.
Das Fettgedruckte muss korrigiert werden. Ich hoffe, ich habe nichts übersehen.
Für das Vokabular und die Rechtschreibung empfehle ich ein gutes (online) Wörterbuch, z.B. pons.eu,
für die Grammatik ego4u.de und englisch-hilfen.de.
:-) AstridDerPu
About Walter Elias Disney
Disney was born on (---) 5th December 1901= geschrieben; gesprochen: on the fifth of December in Hermosa. (Ort vor Zeit) Walter Elias Disney grew up with his parents, his sister Ruth and his three brothers, Herbert, Raymond and Roy on a farm in Missouri. Walt has always been (Zeit, er ist tod.) interested in drawing and visited (Wort) with 14 years his first drawing lessons (Satzstellung). After the first world war disney started to draw short promotional films with Ubbe Iwerks. Hier fehlt eine Präposition 1925 Komma he married Lillian Marie Bounds. With his wife he bedame (Wort, RS) two daughters Diane Marie, Sharon Mae. He was diagnosed with lung cancer kein Punkt. and died on 15 December 1966, ten days after his 65th birthday.
Mickey Mouse and his friends
Disney lost the rights to Oswald, his old charakter so he need (Zeit) to create a new Hier fehlt das Stützwort one. to replace him. Ub Iwerks designed a Mouse and Disney has give (Zeit, RS) him his personality. First Komma the Mouse was named 'Mortimer', but Walters wife Lillian kein Komma thought the name 'Mickey' would fit better. Disney has produced (Zeit) two short silent films with his new charakter Mickey, Plane Crazy and The Gallopin' Gaucho. But both films where not a big sucsess. So Walter published on the 18. November 1928 his first film with sound, Steamboat Willie (Satzstellung). With Walt as the voice of Mickey, the cartoon was an instant sensation. Later Komma Disney and Iwerks created friends for Mickey Mouse. Mickeys female Friend, the mouse Minnie. Minnies
first appearing was already in the film Steamboat Willie.
In 'The Wise litte Hen' Komma Disney shows another friend of Mickey (besser s-genitive). The a little bit aggressive Duck kein Komma Donald. Goofy, who orginally was named Dippy Dawg, had his first occurs
Hier fehlt eine Präposition. 1932 in the film 'Mickeys Revue' (Ort vor Zeit) Punkt
The first appearance of Pluto, Mickey's dog was in 1930 in 'The chain gang'. (Ort vor Zeit)
Most popular movies
Snow White
In 1937 Komma Disney premiered Snow white and the seven dwarfs in Los Angeles. The Movie tell a story about a princess, Snow White, which escapes from her evil stepmother, the queen and live with 7 friendly dwarfs.The Movie won eight oscars.
Pinocchio
In 1940, Disney presendet his second full-length animated film, Pinocchio. Gepettos wish that Pinocchio, a wooden marionette, be a real boy is fulfiled by a fairy. To keep him out of trouble Komma the fairy order Jiminy to act as Pinocchio's "conscience". But Jiminy is not so
sucsessfull and Pinocchio spends almost the full movie to be in trouble. Disney receive two Oscars for that movie.
Peter Pan
In 1953 Komma Disney brought out a movie about a boy who never grew up, peter. Peter takes the three childreen of the Darling family, and takes (Wiederholung) them to Never Land. In Never Land is going on a war between Peters gang and the evil Captain Hook (Satzstellung)
Dumbo
In 1941 Komma Walt Disney celebrate another sucsessfull premiere. The Story: A stork bring a baby elephant to Mrs Jumbo, a circus elephant, because of his really big ears the other elephants call him dumbo. Dumbos only friend is Tymothy Q. the Mouse, who helps him to bring out his full potential. The Movie became (= wurde) one oscar.
Bambi
Bambi, a young deer, grows up and and have fun with his friends, Flower and Thumper, in the forest. One day, however, the hunters come, and Bambi must prove braveness. Disney make a movie from this story and premiered it, in1942 in the UK. (Ort vor Zeit) The movie receive three oscars.
Cinderella
Cinderella a beautiful princess, is treated badly from her stepmother and her daugthers. The stepmother prevents Cinderella from going to a Royal Ball, but with the help from the mice Gus and Jaq and the Fairy Godmother she get to the Ball. That was the story from the movie (---) Disney premiered in 1950 in Boston (Ort vor Zeit). The movie won 3 Oscars.
Das Fettgedruckte muss korrigiert werden. Ich hoffe, ich habe nichts übersehen.
Für das Vokabular und die Rechtschreibung empfehle ich ein gutes (online) Wörterbuch, z.B. pons.eu,
für die Grammatik ego4u.de und englisch-hilfen.de.
AstridDerPu
Sicherheitshalber noch einmal DIE Warnung schlechthin:
Das Verb "become" bedeuet NICHT(!!!!!) "bekommen", sondern "werden".
Uralt - Witz:
Waiter, can I become a mutton chop?
Waiter: I hope not, Sir.