Passt dieser "Formal letter" in Englisch?

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2 Antworten

Dear Mr. Hennings,

I read about your organization in the newspaper a few weeks ago and I´m (Keine Kurzformen in formal letters) interested in making (Wort) a gap year in Australia.

I have just graduated from High School and I still don´t (Keine Kurzformen in formal letters) know what I should study. So I think that a gap year would be great to improve my pronunciation and to level my English up (Wort; Word Order). I am also interested in other cultures and customs and I want (besser: would like) to meet people from all over the world. Because (stilistisch kein guter Satzanfang) I think that there won´t (Keine Kurzformen in formal letters)

be such an opportunity anymore (Ausdruck), now would be the right time for that. It would be great if you could send me further information about your organization and your offers? I would also like Hier fehlt ein Verb. some information about accommodation.

I am looking forward to your reply.

Yours sincerely

Du solltest bei den Satzanfängen variieren, nicht immer I schreiben. Für mich zu wenig formell.

Das Fettgedruckte muss korrigiert werden. Ich hoffe, ich habe nichts übersehen.

Für das Vokabular und die Rechtschreibung empfehle ich ein gutes (online) Wörterbuch, z.B. pons.eu,

für die Grammatik ego4u.de und englisch-hilfen.de.

AstridDerPu

Danke für die Antwort ! :) Was passt bei be such an opportunity anymore nicht ?

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Schön, dass dir meine Antwort (trotzdem) gefallen hat und danke für das Sternchen!

:-) AstridDerPu

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Dear Mr. Hennings, I read about your organization in the newspaper a few weeks ago and I´m interested in making a gap year in Australia.

I have just graduated from High School and I still don´t know what I should study. So I think that a gap year would be great to improve my pronunciation and to level my English up. I am also interested in other cultures and customs and I want to meet people from all over the world. Because I think that there won´t be such an opportunity anymore, now would be the right time for that. It would be great if you could send me further information about your organization and your offers? I would also like some information about accommodation.

I am looking forward to your reply.

Yours sincerely

…….

Nicht "making", sondern "doing" a gap year.

to improve my English , especially my pronunciation

Statt "customs" besser "traditions"

Insgesamt OK!

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@Bswss

Sorry Bswss, aber das sehe ich anders. Immerhin soll es ein formal letter sein.

:-) AstridDerPu

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