Aufsatz in Ordnung? (englisch) abcdefghiljdndjdndjdjdnwj
Hey Leute ich habe einen Aufsatz über california geschrieben und wollte mal fragen ob er in Ordnung ist und was ich besser machen könnte (es geht hauptsächlich um die guten und schlechten Sachen): California was first a Spanish colony an then a province of mexico. The USA won california from mexico in the mexican-american war. In 1850 california became the 31st state of the USA. It is third in area, first in population and first in wealth. Californias wealth comes from its natural resources like oil and gas, agriculture (fruit, flowers, wine), electronics, entertainment and tourism. California has a beautiful countryside. There are forest, mountains, wild animals, deserts, Redwood trees and national parks. In the world famous Sequoia National Park, you can see the worlds largest trees. California offers lots of jobs in the film industry (hollywood), in agriculture and in silicon valley. In Sillicon Valley there are many big and famous high-tech companies like Google or Apple. Because of the plenty of natural resources, like oil and gas, California is the richest State of the US. California is known for lovely beaches, good weather and high standard of livings. But California also bad sides. There are lots of traffic jams in the big cities like Los Angeles or San Fransisco. There are often wild fires because of the great heat. There are great differences between rich and poor people. There are many homeless people in the cities. There are also many earthquakes. because of them thousands of people were killed or injured in the past. And in California are lots of crimes because of the many street groups.
2 Antworten
California was first a Spanish colony an then a province of mexico. The USA won california from mexico in the mexican-american war. In 1850 Komma california became the 31st state of the USA. It is third in area, first in population and first in wealth. Californias wealth comes from its natural resources like oil and gas, agriculture (fruit, flowers, wine), electronics, entertainment and tourism. California has a beautiful countryside. There are forest, mountains, wild animals, deserts, Redwood trees and national parks. In the world famous Sequoia National Park, you can see the worlds largest trees. California offers lots of jobs in the film industry (hollywood), in agriculture and in silicon valley. In Sillicon Valley there are many big and famous high-tech companies like Google or Apple. Because of the plenty of (Stil) natural resources, like oil and gas, California is the richest State of the US. California is known for lovely beaches, good weather and high standard of livings. But California (Hier fehlt ein Verb.) also bad sides. There are lots of traffic jams in the big cities like Los Angeles or San Fransisco. There are often wild fires because of the great heat. There are great differences between rich and poor people. There are many homeless people in the cities. There are also many earthquakes kein
Komma
because of them thousands of people were killed or injured in the past. And (kein Satzfang) in California (Hier fehlt ein Wort.) are lots of crimes because of (---) many street groups.
- zu oft there is / there are
- Achte auf die Klein- und Großschreibung
- Achte auf den s-Genitive
Das Fettgedruckte muss korrigiert werden. Ich hoffe, ich habe nichts übersehen. Für das Vokabular und die Rechtschreibung empfehle ich ein gutes (online) Wörterbuch, z.B. pons.com, für die Grammatik ego4u.de. und englisch-hilfen.de.
:-) AstridDerPu
Schön, dass dir meine Antwort gefallen hat und danke für das Sternchen!
AstridDerPu
Mexican-American war und California groß. There are many earthquakes because... den Punkt nach Earthquake weg. Ich habe nur diese drei-vier Fehler gesehen.
Ok, danke! Das mit der großschreibung lag wohl an der Auto Korrektur :)
Vielen dank! Habe schon einiges korrigiert. Das mit der groß- und Kleinschreibung ist mir bewusst aber es lag wohl an der Auto Korrektur vom Handy. An manchen Stellen habe ich Wörter oder Endungen vergessen. :D