Frage von schinid, 58

Kann jemand meinen Englischbrief korrigieren?

Hallo, Zusammen!

Ich habe einen Brief (Übungsbrief) auf englisch geschrieben, weiss aber nicht wo ich Fehler gemacht habe, und die hab ich bestimmt gemacht )) Ich würde sehr dankbar, wenn jemand meinen Brief korrigiert.

Vielen Dank im Voraus!

Dear Louise, you beat me again yesterday. You beat me, because I came home, when it was already dark. But you forget that now gets dark early, and my working day ends at five, and at this time is already starting to get dark. Unfortunately I can not change the daylight hours, and can not reduce the working day. I am writing this letter to you, because I am afraid to speak with you. Why everything became at us so difficult? Do you remember our wedding, how we were happy? How do you carried me in arms? I knew that I marry the strong woman, and I thought that you will protect me, but not to beat itself. You punish me not for anything. It comes to the absurd. And I can not so any more! If you don't cease to treat so to me, I will leave you! As I still love you, I suggest we find a compromise. I will call you not 4, but 8 once a day and before an exit from work. I very much love you and I hope that at us everything will be good. I ask to respond to my letter with the letter that you again didn't beat me. I love you infinitely. Yours and only yours Patrick.

Expertenantwort
von AstridDerPu, Community-Experte für Englisch, 4

Dear Louise,

you (RS) beat me again yesterday. You beat me (kein Komma) because I came
home, when it was already dark. But you forget that (Hier fehlt etwas.) now gets dark early, and my working day ends at five, and at this (Wort) time (Hier fehlt etwas.) is already starting to get dark.

Unfortunately (Komma) I can not (RS) change the daylight hours, and can
n
ot (RS) reduce (Wort) the (besser: Possessivpronomen) working day. I am writing this letter to you (kein Komma) because I am afraid to speak with you. Why everything became at us so difficult? (Grammatik, Wort, Präposition)
Do you remember our wedding, how we were happy (Satzstellug)? How do you carried me in (Hier fehlt ein Possessivepronomen) arms? (Grammatik, Zeit)

I knew that I marry (Zeit) the (Wort) strong woman, and I thought that you will (Zeit)
protect me, but not to beat itself (Das ergibt keinen Sinn.). You punish me not for anything. (Grammatik; das ergibt keinen Sinn.) It comes to the absurd. (Das ergibt keinen Sinn.) And (kein Satzanfang) I can not so any more! (Das ergibt keinen Sinn.) If you don't cease to treat so to me (Grammatik, Satzstellung, Wort) , I will leave you! As I still love you, I suggest we find a compromise. I will call you not 4, but 8 once (Wort) a day and before an exit (Das ergibt keinen Sinn.) from work. I very much love you (Satzstellung) and I hope that at us (Grammatik) everything will be good (Satzstellung) . I ask (Hier fehlt etwas.) to respond to my letter with the (Wort) letter that you again didn't (Zeit) beat me (Satzstellung). I love you infinitely.

Yours and only yours (Komma, da hinter der Grußformel ein Komma steht.)

Patrick (kein Punkt)

Das Fettgedruckte muss korrigiert werden. Ich hoffe, ich habe nichts übersehen.

Für das Vokabular und die Rechtschreibung empfehle ich ein gutes (online) Wörterbuch, z.B. pons.com,

für die Grammatik ego4u.de und englisch-hilfen.de - und Finger weg vom Google Übelsetzer und seinen tr.tteligen Kollegen!

AstridDerPu

 
Antwort
von jagu24, 17

Hallo schinid!

Ich versuche es mal:

Dear Louise, you beat me again yesterday. You beat me because I came home when it was already dark outside. But you forgot that it gets dark earlier now. My working day ends at five o'clock and at this time it is already starting to get dark outside. Unforunately, I can not change the daylight hours and I can not reduce my work hours. I am writing this letter to you because I am afraid of speaking with you. Why did everything become that difficult for us? Do you remember our wedding and how happy we were? How you carried me on hands? I knew I married the strong woman and I thought you will protect me - but not to beat me. You punish me without any sense. It is getting absurd and I can't do this anymore! If you don't cease to treat me like that, I will leave you! As I still love you, I suggest we will find a compromise. I won't call you 4 but 8 times a day and before I go home from my working place. I love you very much and I hope that we'll be okay again. I'm expecting you to respond to this letter with the words "I didn't beat you again." (hier verstehe ich den Sinn des Satzes nicht). I infinitely love you. Yours, Patrick

Ich hoffe, das passt so und ich habe den Sinn nicht zu sehr geändert :)

Lg, jagu24

Kommentar von Oubyi ,

DH!
Gemeint ist wohl:
"I won't beat you again"

Kommentar von jagu24 ,

Aah, das kann natürlich sein xD

Antwort
von Speerolf, 16

Dear Louise, you beated me again yesterday. You beat me, because I came home, when it was already dark. But you forget that now gets dark early, and my working day ends at five, and at this time it´s already starting to get dark. Unfortunately I can´t change the daylight hours, and also I can´t reduce the working day. I´m writing this letter because I´m afraid to speak with you. I don´t know, why everything between us became so difficult? Do you remember the time we were happy? How do you carried me in arms? I knew that I would marry a strong woman, and I thought that you will protect me, but not to beat itself. You punished me for anything. It comes to the absurd. And I can´t hold out any more! If you don't cease to treat so to me, I will leave you! As I still love you, I suggest we find a compromise. I will call you not 4, but 8 once a day and before an exit from work. I love you very much and I hope that everything will become fine again. I ask to respond to my letter with the letter that you will never beat me. I love you infinitely. Yours and only yours. 

Patrick.

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