Frage von Guz123, 64

Hilfe: Englisch Text kontrollieren?

Ich habe einen Englisch- Text geschrieben:

The 16-year-old Holden Caulfield has screwed up again. For the fourth time he flies from school. This time, because he has not delivered the required performance in four of five subjects and in addition he has committed as a manager of the fencing team at school the mistake of forgetting all the equipment in the subway, which is why his team could not participate. Holden is on that Saturday evening in his room and is disturbed by Stradlater, his neighbors, while reading. This will lend Holdens best jacket, because he has a date with Jane Gallagher. This fact added Holden into a rage because Jane has long been his secret love. Nevertheless, he lends Stradlater the jacket and can also be persuaded of this, to write an essay on its behalf. After a short trip to the city along with Ackley, Holden sets out to write the essay. He writes about the baseball glove of his brother Allie, who died of leukemia. As Stradlater from his rendezvous with Jane comes back and Holden does not want to tell what happened, Holden tears composed for Stradlater essay.

Hilfreichste Antwort - ausgezeichnet vom Fragesteller
von AstridDerPu, Community-Experte für Englisch, 15

(---) 16-year-old Holden Caulfield has screwed up again. For the fourth
time he flies from school. This time, because he has not delivered the
required performance in four of five subjects and in addition (Komma) he has
committed as a manager of the fencing team at school the mistake of
forgetting all the equipment in the subway
(Word Order), which is why his team could not participate. Holden is on that Saturday evening in his room (Word Order) and is (Ich würde hier eine andere Anbindung wählen.) disturbed by Stradlater, his neighbors (= AE; BE = neighbours; Singular), while reading. This (Wort) will (= werden) lend (Wort) Holdens (Grammatik) best jacket (kein Komma) because he has a date with Jane Gallagher. This fact added Holden into a rage (Das ergibt keinen Sinn.) because Jane has long (Ausdruck) been his secret love. Nevertheless, he lends Stradlater the jacket and can also be
persuaded of (---) to write (Grammatik) an essay on its behalf (Ausdruck). After a short trip to the city along with Ackley, Holden sets out to write the essay. He
writes about the baseball glove of his brother Allie (besser: s-genitive), who died of leukemia (= AE; BE = leukaemia). As (Wort) Stradlater from his rendezvous with Jane comes back and Holden does not want to tell (wem=) what happened, Holden tears composed for Stradlater essay. (Word Order, das ergibt keinen Sinn)

Das Fettgedruckte muss korrigiert werden. Ich hoffe, ich habe nichts übersehen.

Für das Vokabular und die Rechtschreibung empfehle ich ein gutes (online) Wörterbuch, z.B. pons.com, für die Grammatik ego4u.de und englisch-hilfen.de - und Finger weg vom Google Übelsetzer und seinen tr.tteligen Kollegen!.

:-) AstridDerPu

Kommentar von Guz123 ,

Danke :)

Kommentar von AstridDerPu ,

Schön, dass dir meine Antwort (trotzdem) gefallen hat und danke für das Sternchen!

AstridDerPu

Antwort
von Guz88, 2

Dien Text ist faslch.

Antwort
von Lorbeerbaum, 27

Hallo!

Das Einzige was mir einfällt ist :

The 16 years old....

Lg
Lorbeerbaum

Kommentar von Guz123 ,

bist du verwand mit kirschbaum :P

Kommentar von Lorbeerbaum ,

Nicht das ich wüsste :D

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