Benötige Hilfe bei meinen Englischhausaufgaben

Hello,

My name is Tim and I´m 15 years old. I come from Cologne in Nordrhein-Westfalen and my hobbies are going to the cinema, chatting, playing soccer and reading books. I have two older brothers Lukas and Christoph. At the moment, I am attending the Realschule in my town. Our school has 21 classes, 35 teachers and 500 pupils. After finishing school, I would like to work in an office or as a shop assistant.

Ist alles korect

Hello,

My name is Tim and I´m 15 years old. I come from Cologne in Nordrhein-Westfalen and my hobbies are going to the cinema, chatting, playing soccer and reading books. I have two older brothers Lukas and Christoph. At the moment, I am attending the Realschule in my town. Our school has 21 classes, 35 teachers and 500 pupils. After finishing school, I would like to work in an office or as a shop assistant.

man sagt go to the movies und bei den namen reicht auch I have to older brothers called...

nach at the moment kommt present, nicht past

Sei nicht böse, aber das wusstest Du doch heute mittag auch schon. Du machstum 22:00 Uhr erst Hausaufgaben? Nun ab ins Bettchen.

also wenn schon, dann : at the moment, i visit the realsschool in my city... klingt aba komisch^^ vll. den satz doch ganz anders?!? naja und: in an office or as a shop assistant. oh und after school (kein komma) i would...

I´m visiting the realschule.

who are called Lukas and Christoph. I attend (nicht visit). kein komma nach after school. as A shop assistant